19.4.2005

Querido Papá,

I’m sure by now Mamá has found you. I hope that the two of our are happy and reunited at last. The past few days have been hard. Enrique called and said that I’m welcome to come stay with him and Sofía and Gabriel in La Plata for a little while until I am ready to go back to work, but I told him that I would have to think about it, and since then I have not done so.

Cristian has been so supportive. He’s been on the phone with Enrique many times, making arrangements for the funeral and the Vigil. When I didn’t get out of bed until noon today, he brought me yerba mate with hot milk and orange peels and sat with me for a while before helping me up to shower. He left for a bit in the evening, telling me he was going to the florist, but when he came back he had brought Rosa with him.

It was the first time that we had seen each other in many years. She told me she was so sorry to hear about Mamá, and that she was sorry she hadn’t contacted me sooner, and that she was sorry for being such a terrible friend. I told her that last one wasn’t true and I saw her throat working and then we both started laughing and crying all over each other. If there is one good thing to come out of all this, it is that she is by my side once again.

We must have talked for several hours. I told her all about the troubles that Cristian and I went through trying to have a kid and our disagreements over politics, but that as we’ve learned about the horrors that people went through and I’ve become more aware of everything that happened, our marriage has gotten much stronger. She said that she was happy for me and thankful that my marriage did not end as miserably as hers. She said that a few years ago, she and her husband had gotten a divorce. He’d admitted to her that through the papers he saw in his job, he knew all about the tortures and the disappearances. Once everything started coming out into the open, and especially after Scilingo’s testimony about the death flights ten years ago, he became more and more anxious about his job and whether he would suffer consequences and started getting angry at her at home when things weren’t going the way he wanted. She tried to stay with him for as long as she could, working things out, but in the end she was forced to get a civil divorce. The Church won’t allow her to get remarried, but she said she is not too concerned about finding a new husband anyways. When our throats started to go dry from all this talking, we turned on the news and saw the result of Scilingo’s trial. She said that there’s a sense of justice that she feels, even though it is Scilingo who received the verdict instead of her husband.

She promised me that she will be there for the funeral. Between her and Cristian and Enrique, I’m so grateful to be surrounded by all of this support. I’m sure that you and Mamá are also watching out for us, and for that I’m thankful.

Malena

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