Today marks one month since the military coup. Though my parents told me not to, I held out hope that things would be better after Allende, but they’re not. Before yes there were shortages and my parents store struggled a lot. We kept having to raise prices and we couldn’t get our hands on a lot of basic items like flour and bread that we relied on selling to make our money. But things have definitely not gotten better. I am so grateful that my family is still together! And I can’t believe I have to say that. Yet I’m so scared all the time that I’m going to come home from school to find my father or my mother gone. It happened to Isabella. She wasn’t in school yesterday and when I got home my parents sat me down in the store and told me why. I couldn’t help but burst into tears. Isabella’s parents supported Allende and the Popular Unity just like mine. They both worked in a textile factory and I guess had some sort of leadership position in the union. And then 2 days ago, right in the middle of the workday, a military official came in and told Isabella’s father that he needed to come with him and now it’s been 3 days and no one’s seen or heard from him. Same thing happened to Emiliano’s mom.
I’ve started to pray. I’ve always gone to mass. Almost every Sunday since I was born, but only now have I really begun to pray outside of Church, to pray in my own words. It feels wrong that I’ve only started now that I need prayer, but there’s nothing I can do about that. I’ve found myself praying all the time- for safety and for change and for my anxiety to go away. I pray to be stronger and to not have so much fear because I don’t think things are going to get better anytime soon. My brother tells me to have hope, but it’s hard.